Failure, then after what?

I remember that I failed last year and I wasn't able to undergo internship. Some of my classmates, for example when they failed, also felt the same way - sadness, anxiety and grief. It's common for people to cry. But what's after crying? Here's are some a handful of what-they-do after they failed and what-you-can-do if you fail.

1. Undergo the Kuby's Five Stages of Overcoming Grief
This can be applied to this situation. Just imagine...
Anger: Becoming angry at the instructors because they failed you. Anger is normal, if in moderation. It's healthy if you don't hurt other people.
Denial: You don't accept that you failed. Hence, you asked for recomputation.
Bargaining: You said to yourself, "if only I didn't sleep that night," or "if only I passed that exam." And the list goes on.
Depression: There you go crying, and showers of hug may come to you.
Acceptance: The final stage where you accept it. You have an idea that, "this is not yet my time", "I can do better next time" or "God has a reason why He let me failed"

2. Ungroup/unfriend in FB or Twitter those who passed
Honestly, this is childish so don't do this. This doesn't help anyway. The better way is detach yourself from Facebook and Twitter for a some time so that you may avoid their posts like, "Yehey! I passed". That doesn't help, it makes you feel more sad.

3. Going to the karaoke and drink!
Some of my peers actually did this. They go to this place, drink gallons of beer and sing like there's no tomorrow. The obvious reason is that they want to release their "maoy" or sadness over the result. But the deeper reason is that they need companionship.

4. Punch the wall
While it is painful, punching the wall will let you release that energy.

5. Talk to your parents or anyone
Their words of wisdom can be helpful. This eases your sadness.

6. Distract yourself Distract yourself from thinking about that failure is a big help. Do productive things like business or do extraordinary things like shaving your fair.

Remember that failure is not the opposite of success. In fact, failure is part of success. It's not the end of all things, but think of it as the beginning of new things.

Unsung Hero

This advertisement from Thai Life Insurance has been making rounds in social media lately. Synonymous with other advertisements from the said company, this advertisement has brought message of kindness and goodwill.

SmallTalk: How To Choose Your Course

Choosing a college course is a big decision. Months before you graduate in high school, your parents always ask you what course in college do you want to pursue. In simple term, what do you want to be? If you have a degree in your mind right now, congratulations! You won’t go through the hassles of procrastination of finding one. But if you haven’t found one, here are my advice that you may take or leave.

 

1. Identify your goals. This is the first thing that you need to do. Identify your goals in life by looking into yourself. Ask yourself several questions: What is my goal in life? What are my dreams that I want to achieve? Superficial reasons why you are inclining to that course such as "because it is popular" or "because my friends also took it" is not healthy; there needs to be a deeper and more inquisitive reason why you choose this. For example, "I want to be a doctor to help sick people" or "I want to be a lawyer to protect other people especially the indigent." Through this, you plant a deeper root and foundation for the career that you are taking in.

2. Consider your talents. Ask yourself again, "What interest me?" A good example of this case was the character, Farhan in the Indian movie, Three Idiots. His father who sealed his fate since the day he was born, wanted him to become an Engineer so he studied one. However, deep down inside he loves to take pictures of wild animals because that makes him happy. Choosing a course that is related to your interest or hobby could bring satisfaction and an advantage because you have that skill already. For example, if you're passionate for writing, why not take writing-related courses such as Mass Communication or if you love to paint, Fine Arts would suit for you. Don’t you notice that whenever you are engaging in your hobby/interest, there’s a feeling of fulfillment because you love what you are doing.

3. Make a list. Write a list on the courses that you can think of based on your goals, interest and hobbies. By listing it, you will have an idea of what you want and you will not miss something.

4. Listen to your parents but don't forget to listen to yourself.  Your parents definitely has a say on your college education. Dad said, "I want you to take Political Science because I want you to fulfill my dream to become a lawyer" or Mom said, "I want you to take Nursing because Nursing is the most popular course today." Yes, parents has suggestions and advices even wishes because after all, they're the one who took care of you, rear you and mold your character. Not to mention, they're also the one who will be spending your education. But before diving in to their suggestions, think about it. Who is going to study and who is going to run through four or five years in college? Not them, it's you. So listen to yourself, don't just 'feel' your decision, but rather have a stand. The problem of choosing a career that your parents want you to take begins after realization, if it will occur, that it is not for you as well as the pressure on your arms especially if that course is out of your league. Thoughts such as, "I don't like my course and I want to shift. But what if my parents don't want me to?" So think about it a hundred times and let your parents know about it. 

5. Interview people who have graduated with the course. Correct me if I am wrong to conclude that most people who enter their college course never consult someone who had graduated from it. Or rather to put it simply, they don't have any slightest idea of what they are entering. Most of the students who will go to college and pursue a course have an idea of that course based on the bird's eyeview of other people, who never studied it. And when they asked one graduate, most students usually asked this one particular question, "is it hard?"

 

6. Research. This is somewhat synonymous with the saying, "Before you invest, investigate". Let's face it, college education is an investment, not only your parents but for you as well. The internet has a wide variety of information that it can offer about the course that you want to take with just a click away. Again, the best research that you can do is to ask other people who have a first-hand experience with the course/profession.

7. Think about the other factors. There are other factors that can affect your choice. Two of the things that can affect one's choice on college were on the financial aspect and the demand of the course in the market. The cost of the degree is no-joke. If you want to study medicine to become a doctor, you need to undergo a four-year undergraduate studies. Before entering medicine, you need to take the National Medical Admission Test. Once, you pass you need to spend another four years studying which roughly cost P75,000 above per semester. After which, another year for internship and another year for residency. (I am not discouraging to get medicine.) Yes, college education is expensive, as what I have said it is an investment. However, if you really want it, there’s no such thing as impossible, right?

The demand of the course in the market is also a factor. The question, "Can I find a job right away after graduating with this course?" sneaks into the picture. According to the Department of Labor and Employment, job mismatch is the culprit why the unemployment rate in the Philippines remain unchanged. Also, the stiff competition between applicants as well as the lack of job opportunity in the country contributes to unemployment.  Last January 2014, DOLE has released the list of the 43 in-demand and hard to fill occupations. Among them were accountancy, medical technology and agriculture. Sadly, most high school graduates nowadays enroll to courses that they think that are popular and would bring them an opportunity to work abroad as soon as possible. Don't let yourself be a victim of delusion of making money fast in less than a year and become rich quickly, or going to work abroad and earn citizenship there.

College education is important. This is about your ambition in life and the path that you want to take. This will bring you opportunity starting off during job search until promotions. It is your arms in this world that is a competitive place where everyone are expected to come on top and where everyone can be trampled because they have none. This is about your parents' dream, an inheritance that they can give you for the rest of your life. And this is about your country, where your diploma can help, build, develop and uplift your community and our nation.



(Author's Note: This is what I learned after reading self-help books and realization hit me after failing twice.)

Random Thoughts: I Am Not Perfect

I was browsing for some videos in Youtube until I remember my mother talked about Ms. Iza Calzado’s interview by no other than the King of Talk, Boy Abunda. One statement that caught me was “Ang hirap, di ako perpekto”.

It is so hard to be perfect to begin with because there’s no such thing as one. We are all created by God in His likeness and image, however, we are still not perfect. We had our own faults, our mistakes and our imperfections because after all, we are human beings.

Let me share my one imperfection and forgive me if I may sound bitter. I admit that I am no good in writing and grammar. I had a share of criticism by my friends when I asked them to read a draft of my post here. One friend of mine ridicule my own story of mine as lame and confused. Probably, they are expecting my own work as grandeous as Shakespeare or an inch of Nicholas Sparks. But it is not. Grammars and contents of that draft were scathe. It hurts me. Criticism crippled me. I almost stopped myself from the idea of writing and whenever I try to write, their voices echoes in my head. There is one time that I asked my mom if I am good at writing or I talked to a friend about this predicament. But here I am now, still writing because it is my passion.

I am not perfect just as what everyone wanted nor I don’t like to follow most of the social norms. It is not me. I cannot always be the good guy that everyone is expecting nor I cannot always be the best student or whatever that everyone sees. It is hard to be in the radar of other people’s expectation because a single move, even in a move of an eyebrow stirs criticism. But I will always keep my imperfection (that I wanted to embrace and to love them) because it is me.

I am not perfect. The only perfect in me is my imperfection.

K!Lig: When A Matchmaker Fall in Love

I just saw this video in Youtube a while ago, so might as well that I want to share this here on my notebook. The song played in this video is "Unspoken Love". And yes, the title of the video is When A Matchmaker Fall in Love.

Eleven Things You Did Not Learn In School

I was climbing upstairs to get the result of an exam when I saw this, Eleven Things You Did Not Learn In School. This was posted in the bulletin board in the College. I read it, it interest me so I will share this.

RULE 1

Life is not fair - get used to it. 

 

 

RULE 2

The world won't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself. 

 

RULE 3

You will NOT make 40 thousand dollars a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice president with car phone, until you earn both. 

 

RULE 4

If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss. He doesn't have tenure. 

 

RULE 5

Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had a different word for burger flipping they called it Opportunity. 

 

RULE 6

If you mess up,it's not your parents' fault, so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them. 

 

RULE 7

Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you are. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent's generation, try delousing the closet in your own room. 

RULE 8

Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life has not. In some schools they have abolished failing grades and they'll give you as many times as you want to get the right answer. This doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life. 

 

RULE 9

Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you find yourself. Do that on your own time. 

 

RULE 10

Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs. 

RULE 11

Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one. 

 

 

(This was taken  from Charles' Sykes book, "Dumbing Down Our Kids".  And Bill Gates, founder of Microsoft, addressed this to high school graduates during a commencement exercise. He talks about how feel-good, politically correct teachings created a generation of kids with no concept of reality and how this concept set them up for failure in the real world.)

 

SmallTalk: United Nations International Day of Happiness!

Happiness n. is the quality or state of being happy. That's according to dictionary. In Tagalog, kaligayahan. We're all meant to be happy if you agree or not. But what will make you happy? Actually, anything can make you happy. A good family life, a good love life, a good fortune etc.. However, as know it, life also has struggles and sad parts that if you want to be happy, you can't see happiness. Luckily, the remedy of that is find happiness in every little details and be thankful to it. These things, I mean, like you are able to wake up every morning, like you had a good food to eat etc. and oh yeah, don't forget that you have people in life. Be thankful in every happiness and also, share it to others.

As Ryzza Mae Dizon said, "Bawal ang sad, dapat happy!" So smile and be happy.

For my another happiness post, here's from 9Gag: (courtesy of 9Gag)

"Our Happiness Lies in the Happiness of Other People!"

Random Thoughts

Sleep might not be visiting me tonight. My mind is occupied with several thoughts, confusions everything, name it.

#1. I saw the news clip a while ago about this year’sBar exam and its topnotcher. For me, this has given me a little inspiration for my studies.

#2. I had been reading some notes these past days, a little review perhaps for my return to my former school. As you know, in my last personal post, I failed again and I need to wait for 7 months to go back again, pass those subjects I failed, be an intern, graduate, take a board and work. Yeah, (for me), the ever-repeating cycle of life.

#3. During those past 7 months, fate smiled at me. Together with my three other friends, I cross-enrolled to another Medtech school here in Cebu for one subject. And yes, I got to experience a new set of things; the environment, the teachers etc. When someone would asked me to compare those two, however, I want to decline to answer it nor I have a tendency to lie. There is a significant difference. I just answered though, “I invoke my right against self-incrimination.”

#4. I’ll be studying for my final exam in that school. I’ll surely miss those. I hope that, one day, I’ll get to step there again.

#5. I thought about my former college publication to which I passed an article. Unfortunately, the editor-in-chief had texted me days after, telling me that he wasn’t able to include mine because of the limited pages. He recommended ny articles to a certain school and they’re asking my approval to which I granted. At first, I was feeling despair about it, even to the point of asking myself if I am a good writer but soon enough when I think of all the things, maybe there’s positive outcome why it had happened. Maybe out there, my article could influence teens not to smoke, give them a lesson that life is a challenge like flappy bird or get involve in politics.

So that’s it for my random thoughts tonight.

SmallTalk: Battle of the Mermaids

Philippine television is once again infiltrated with mermaid characters courtesy of the latest offering of two of the biggest networks in the country, GMA and ABS-CBN.

ABS-CBN adapted the Philippine comics most-loved mermaid, Dyesebel into the small screen with Anne Curtis as its titular character. On the other hand, GMA has Kambal Sirena which stars Louise delos Reyes playing twins Alona and Perlas.

Mermaids in television and movies are not new, to begin with. Several movies have been made with mermaid playing as the central character. Dyesebel since the 1950s was played by several well-respected actresses. There are also other mermaid characters on the television: Marina which was played Claudine Baretto way back 2004, the fantasy-comedy, Marinara played Rufa Mae Quinto and now, Kambal Sirena.

These tale of half human, half fish characters have something in common. They are born to a human parent or one of their parent is a mermaid. Their love interest is a human while the antagonist is their love interest's fiance. The mermaid character has a loving, adopted mermaid mother and an enemy who happens to have magical powers. An angry mob who believes that mermaids are carriers of bad luck will separate the mermaid from his biological parents. They also got to experience to walk on the earth thanks to a magic necklace given by a sea witch.

So what's with fascination of Pinoys with mermaids? I don't know. Maybe because we are a country surrounded by sea and our imaginations are quite creative. Nevertheless, these mermaid stories have lighten up our imagination and bringing fantasy right in front of us even it is in the small tube.

And as for Dyesebel and Kambal Sirena, whoever will win, so be it. What matters most is quality and entertainment.

SmallTalk: Limiting foreign telenovelas?

One of the bills that filed today in Congress is House Bill 3839 by former Manila Mayor and now Buhay Partylist Congressman Lito Atienza. The bill seeks to limit foreign dramas may it be Korean or Mexican during prime time that is between 6PM to 10 PM.

“While it is entertaining to watch television shows also known as teleseryers from our neighboring countries such as South Korea, Japan and Taiwan, the proliferation of such shows lessen the time available for our Philippine-produced shows,” Atienza states. 

I commend Mr. Atienza’s objective to give greater time for Philippine produce shows. Through the years, Philippine dramas are not as par as the quality that foreign teleseryes especially Korean dramas has. Overused plots, poor acting and commercialism are several reasons causing the degradation of quality of Philippine dramas. Today, Philippine dramas are slowly improving.

However, this bill is unnecessary. Between 6PM to 10PM, locally-produced shows are broadcast. If there is, the drama is broadcast at 6PM which is seldom. Most foreign dramas in primetime are broadcast after 10PM. The bill should have been filed during the heyday of Mexican and Korean dramas. Besides, foreign dramas are not rating well unlike Pinoy dramas. In fact, the finale of Got to Believe last Friday is the highest rating, so far, for this year.

Limiting foreign telenovelas is not a bad thing either. This could encourage producers to produce more dramas. But the problems with locally-produced shows, the quality, is the reason why viewers like me watches foreign telenovelas on TV or online.

InstaPic: “Wheel”

Life is a wheel. It goes to the destination where God wants us to go to. It may stop but never it be that it will not move anymore. A wheel is a reminder of the cycle of life. One time, we are young and next, we’re surprised to see that we’re getting old. One time, we’re sad and the next thing we know, that sadness is replaced by joy. One time, we’re down but time will came that we will be on top. 

Epilogue: This past week, I was learning how to drive again. I hired an instructor - a licensed driver himself to teach me the hows of driving. The first time that I was learning how to drive, that was about two years ago, wasn’t as good as now.  I stopped learning out of discouragement. What urges to learn how to drive again was the realization that I need it someday when internship comes. Right now, I am enjoying it though there are unusual circumstances.

NowUKnow: Philippine Geography

Before commencing on my article about Philippine Geography, let me test how you know about the geography of the Philippines? The price if you get three answers correctly is secret.. So game!

1. What is the capital city of Zamboanga del Norte?
     A. Dipolog City               B. Zamboanga City             C. Dapitan City               D. Ipil
2. In what group of islands, do Saluag Island located?
     A. Luzon                         B. Visayas                           C. Mindanao                  D. Spratlys
3. If Batanes is the northernmost, Tawi-tawi is the southernmost and Palawan is the westernmost province of the Philippines, what is the easternmost province?
     A. Catanduanes               B. Surigao del Sur                C. Davao Oriental          D. Samar

If you got all the three correctly (I reveal the answer later), congratulations! you really listened to your geography teacher. But sorry to say this, there is no price actually.

So much of this, I would like to talk about Philippine Geography. I came across with a thread topic in Pinoyexchange a few days ago that asked if Filipinos are knowledgeable towards geography of the Philippines. Handful of posts replied that Filipinos (let's say, not all) are knowledgeable towards geography.

Looking back on our geography (Geography 101): The Philippines has an area of 300,000 sq.km with 7,107 islands (low tide). There are three main island groups; Luzon (the largest), Visayas and Mindanao. Politically, the Philippines has 17 regions with an autonomous (ARMM), administrative (CAR) and metropolitan (NCR); and about 80 provinces with Dinagat Island as the newest. Manila is the capital city of the Philippines. Topographically, obviously, Philippines is blessed with mountains, rivers and natural resources. Mouth Apo is the highest peak in the Philippines located in the island of Davao while Cagayan River is the longest located in Luzon These are just few of the tons of information that every Filipino children learns from Grade One to High School.

Geography has played a relevant part of the country's history. Contrary to what other people believe, the Philippines already has an existing civilization though not as grandeous as the Chinese or the Romans themselves. The Philippines was already populated by different groups of people such as the Aetas (who came through land bridges) and from people from  Malaysia and IndoChina. They settle down on the different islands, form villages and governments of their own. Because the Philippines is an archipelago, it is noted that in different islands, local kingdoms are established. However, these kingdoms are divided and it pave a way for Spaniards to conquer these kingdoms and change the wheels of history.

In terms of the cultural aspect of the Filipinos, I can say that it is diverse, courtesy of our geography. Different people or ethnics has different cultures, traditions and languages. For examples, the people in Cordilleras has a tattoo tradition whereas, the Ivatans (the people in Batanes) had built large stone houses against typhoons that visits them yearly. In languages, there are between 120 and 175 languages in the Philippines, aside from Filipino and English as the national languages. Among these are Cebuano, Ilonggo, Hiligaynon and more. It is no wonder that it is really more fun in the Philippines, having diversity on its own.

The Philippines is rich in natural resources. Chocolate Hills, Puerto Princess Underground River and Tubattaha Reef are among the wonders of nature that can be found in the Philippines. The country is rich in gold, nickel and several other minerals. In biodiversity, the Philippines is home to several and exotic flora and fauna such as Tarsier, the Philippine Eagle and Whale Shark. Rafflesia arnoldi, the world's largest flora can be also found here.

There are so much to be proud of our country. Amidst the social and political issues, we, Filipinos have so much to be thankful for. Might as well, we need to discover the natural wonders in our country by travelling and not to mention, helping this to preserve it so that the next generations to come will enjoy the same wonders that what we are seeing. To answer the questions above: Dipolog City is the capital of Zamboanga del Norte; Saluag Island is located in Mindanao, in fact, this is the southernmost island; and Davao Oriental is the easternmost province of the Philippines. NowUKnow!

Life as a Flappy Bird

            Over the past weeks, I had seen a handful of people playing a game called Flappy Bird. Whether they are in the mall with their friends, in school canteen or even inside the classroom during the lecture, smart phone users tap their fingers through the screen. Intrigued, I tried once playing this game and I scored only one or two. So what’s make this game the talk of the town?

            The goal of the game was to navigate the bird through the green pipes by tapping your smart phone to keep the bird afloat. Quite easy, huh? Your fingers must be fast enough and the user must have a good control/reflexes or else the bird would hit a green pipe and game over. In other words, the game is challenging. I could really heard “Arrggh” moments from frustrated gamers who hit a green pipe. Gamers love the game and at the same time, hate it. I just hope that gamers would not throw their smart phones away if they got frustrated. It's a test of patience, indeed.

         

What Flappy Bird teaches us or what Flappy Bird reflects life? It’s simple, move forward. Green pipes are like challenges; they come in different lengths and different situations, sometimes with a twist. The only thing that someone can do to win against challenges is to move and fly forward through these challenges. There’s no such thing in life as a pause or stop button like the game. You can't take a stop everything even time itself. Everything needs to move forward whether you like it or not. You cannot even move backward and go back to the past. Also, there is no fast forward in life because everything needs to take one step and one pipe at a time. You cannot expect a child to become an adult and think like one in just one day; it needs time to become mature to learn. It’s called development. However, while moving forward, don’t fly too high for you might hit a green pipe that would put you down right away nor don’t fly too low because again, you might hit a green pipe would put you on the ground. Don’t make yourself too high nor don’t put yourself too low. Just keep yourself through the times. If you happen to be thrown out by challenges, there’s always a starting line where you can start over to redeem yourself. And along the way, enjoy life.  

Ellen Adarna Exercise Video Parody

While 3 million people have already viewed the exercise video of Ms. Ellen Adarna, here's another video from Youtube that is trying to make a wave - the video parody of Ellen Adarna's exercise video.

Here's one thing I can say: Go, Kuya! I-push mo yan!

38th National Artist Jose Joya Awards and 39th Annual Student's Exhibit

The University of the Philippines-Cebu Fine Arts Student Organization presents the 38th National Artist Jose Joya Awards and 39th Annual Student's Exhibit. Different artworks were presented at the second floor of New Annex, Ayala Center Cebu. The said exhibition opened last February 17.

The event started in 1976 in honor to the then-Dean of the University of the Philippines-Diliman Fine Arts, Jose Joya who supported and initiated the establishment of a fine arts school in the Cebu branch of UP, the first to set up a fine arts school outside Visayas. Jose Joya, aside from being the former dean of the College of Fine Arts of UP, is also known for his works such as Granadean Arabesque and Nanking. Together with Napoleon Abueva, he represented the Philippines to the XXXII Venice Biennial in 1964. In 2003, Jose Joya was awarded as National Artist posthumously.

"Innocence"

Both the award and the exhibition showcases the diverse talents of UP Cebu students in creating artworks and expressing their thoughts visually to the public. I was lucky yesterday to be able to talk with the grand winner of the said competition, Mr. Ferdinand Aragon. His inspiration for his collage, "Innocence" was from the recent news of young girls who became victims of child pornography in some towns in Cebu. The collage were made of newspapers and magazines cut and molded and fitted to be an image of a young girl.

Here are some of the artworks featured in the exhibit:

"Janus"

"#Throwback Thursday"

"The Pearl Atlas"

"Calypso's Clavier"

"The Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil"

If you are interested and have plans to see these wonderful artworks, you can still catch the exhibition. It will last until February 28.

A quote from Degas, "Art is not what you see but what you make others see.”

K!Lig-novela: Rejection

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen and welcome for another night of K!Lig-novela @ What's in my notebook. This is a question to all the guys out there: have your experienced heart break?Surely, our letter for today may somewhat touch the hearts of guys who have experienced heart break when the girl of their dreams had reject their proposal. 
 
Dear Papa Ken,

Is it hard to answer YES to a question? Please call me Victor. I had a crush on someone, in the same class as mine. Her name is Lou. She is a beautiful girl. Her smile charmed me for a long time. Though she maybe like what they as 'sosyal' but she is actually very approaching and friendly to everyone in our class. I just happen to be around with her because her friends and my friends in class are close. I tried to make her feel about what I think for her yet her respond is mild. One day, Papa Ken, I decided to do what any man can do for the girl of their dreams - to propose to her, to ask her to be my girl friend. I brought chocolates and flowers and set up some of her friends (though some of them, by the looks of their face are reluctant about it). It was a sunny afternoon, in front of some people in our canteen that I proposed to her. "Lou," I started. "Will you be my girl friend?" She smiled for a minute, however, her smile changes to doubts when she cast her stare on me. She answered, "Sorry, Victor. But I think this is not the right time for me to get involved in a relationship." And she just left. Papa Ken, I don't know what to do. Yes, I am sad about what had happened, that she didn't answer YES to my proposal. From that day on, I distanced myself to her. Papa Ken, what is your advice? Will I still pursue her or let it be?

Before I give my advice to you, here is a song from King entitled Maybe

To start with Victor, you're just being impatient. I don't mean to insult you nor anything but you just move with having calculated risk in mind. Are you expecting a girl to say YES right away just because you and her are close enough. Think about it. What if the girl thinks that you are just a friend to her (or a confidant). I maybe wrong but you have just misinterpreted everything. 

Now, your question about if you want to pursue her or let her be, I cannot answer it for you. If you pursue her, change your tactics. Remember, ang panliligaw ay parang chess iyan, you make your move with tactics. Think about how the girl of your dreams fall for you. Don't just be close to her for the danger of it is that you might be friend-zone to which any guy would not want it, right? Get to know each other, be close to her but leave some space. On the other hand, if you let her, that's also fine. Try to see if you can live with it. 

The best advice that I can give you is don't focus yourself on courtship and of her, because she is not the center of your life. Why not focus on your studies, your relationship to others and your faith? Grow, ika nga. Accept the rejection. I don't also advice you, Victor, to distance yourself to her. She might misinterpret that you are bitter about it and your chances on her will reduce. Rather, let things be normal between the two of you.  

Friends, a rejection is inevitable in the game of life. There is no such thing that everyday, the things that we want, we get it right away nor we receive acceptance in a blink of an eye. A rejection doesn't mean that you are not wanted or even, unlove but rather a rejection is just an acceptance in delay, a brother of failure who happens to be a delayed success. The rejection doesn't define you, it is how you accept rejection that defines you. I am Papa Ken, and this is K!Lig-novela @ What's in my notebook. 

Good Night!

SmallTalk: Love is.

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone!!! I hope that you enjoyed your day in celebrating the most kilig day of the year. Before I start my small talk, here is the song from the musical movie Rent, "Seasons of Love".

Usually, when people answered the question what is love, they define it as love as a feeling, love is with a partner or even having this famous quotable quote as "love is blind". I was asked one time and I quote that tagline of a famous Thai movie, "Love is an evolve form of emotional attachment that transcends gender and physical form." This is as close as I think of what Love can be. Let me share what I think of those definitions above with my changing perspective of what Love is.

I believe that Love is not a feeling or emotions because if it is a feeling, then like anger, it will also fade away in the twilight. That kind of feeling is actually infatuation.

Love is with a partner, well, not necessarily with a partner. You love your family, you love other people like your friends, you love your country and most especially, you love God.

Love is not blind. Love, rather, is acceptance (no matter) of who and what the person is. It is fully accepting the person's strengths, weakness, attitude and past.

And also, Love is security and loyalty.


Again, Happy Valentine's Day!!! Remember, February 14 is not the only day of love; it is everyday as long as there is love. Just as what the song says, Love makes the world go round.

Here’s another song from the Beatles, “All you need is Love”:

K!Lig-novela: Papa Ruru

Good evening ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to K!Lig-novela, at What's in my notebook. Let me start an introduction with a mild simple question: have you experienced having a crush on someone? Well, this question may sound childish but this might be definitely true to all. Everyone may experience affection in their life either they might be someone close to them, their friend or classmates. If you haven't experience having a crush on someone, as what someone I know said that it is abnormal. Our letter sender for tonight shares her love story, her crush on somebody. But the things is that the person she likes is a stranger to her at all.

Dear Papa Ken,

Please call me Chin-chin. I am 20 years old, in my third year studying in a well-known university in Manila. I have met this guy and let's call him Ruru. The guy that I liked is tall, dark and not to mention, handsome. He is currently studying in the same university as mine, however we are not classmates nor we are not in the same department. I met him once when accidentally, he mistook me as his girlfriend while going back home to the dormitory. His hug shocked me but his sight surprise me. I don't know if that is by accident but that accident made me never forget about him. Luckily, Papa Ken, I had a friend in the same department. When I told her that it was him, she gladly told me that Papa Ruru is also her classmate in one of her subject. She could help me know about Papa Ruru. That day onwards, I often see Papa Ruru. I don't know if all things happened by chance that I saw him. But when I did, I grab the chance to steal a glance towards him. I instantly took it back when I felt that he suspects it.  I have to say that seeing him everyday always give me inspiration and draw a smile on my face. I learned more something about him through my friend that he is good at basketball and excels in academics. Truly, I have a crush on him. I fell more for him when I learned that he and his girlfriend broke up. I felt like it is a heaven-sent chance for me to introduce myself to him. My question, Papa Ken, is that should I do it now? What should I do, Papa Ken with my feeling for him?

Good evening, Chin-chin. Before I start my advice for you, let me dedicate this song for you, coming for 1:43 "Sa Isang Sulyap Mo".

To our letter sender: Well, to answer your first question, it depends on you when is the right time for you to introduce yourself to him. If you want to introduce yourself to him by tomorrow, it's fine. But I advice you to look his situation beforehand. What if, he is still clamoring for his girlfriend or the pain is there. Try to think first before you act. On your second question, I don't want to say that you should supress your feelings for him but convert that feelings, as you have said, an inspiration, to your studies. Don't divert your attention to him but focus, first on your studies, so that by the time that you are ready to face him, at least, you have something more to offer - that is you have good grades and getting graduate. And at least, it will make your parents proud of you at the same time. I advice you to know him better through your friend. Time comes that you might know him better personally.

In life, we have our own what we call as crush or inspiration. They are people that sometimes complete our day without them knowing that they are. They are inspire us to do more things and make our own better self. But what makes us truly better and who we us are, is not crush or inspiration alone, but we ourselves. Thank you for reading the K!Lig-novela @ What's in my notebook. Good Night!

Dating Places for Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day is just around the corner. And here you are wondering where you will take the love of your life for a date this Valentines’ Day.  What if, you want something romantic yet she wants something new. Here are my suggestions which you may take it or leave it.

If you are dating someone, this suggestion might be an answer. Take her to the movie house. But here’s the catch. Don’t choose to watch romantic movies, just horror movies. So that when she’s frighten, she might give you a free hug. However, just prepare earbuds, her scream’s loud. 

Take her to BDO. And when she ask why, then tell her, “I wanna Be D Only one for you.” Who knows, she might invest her future on you. 

How about coffee shop. But don’t order cappuccino nor espresso, just request a Nescafe coffee. And tell her, “Ang pag-ibig ko sa iyo ay parang kape, nangingibabaw.” Or else, give her a San Miguel Beer keychain (even a bottle) with words inscribe, “Ang pag-ibig ko sa iyo ay walang katulad!” 

If both of you loves sports, then this one might give you a good score. Play a basketball or tennis with her, one-on-one. But purposively don’t dunk the ball nor return the tennis ball back to her. So when she asked why, you answer, “kasi lagi kitang nami-miss.” But if you have a playboy reputation, avoid this. She might say that you just fooling her or binobola mo lang.

If she is nerdy, take her to the Chemistry laboratory. Reason out that you can’t take her to lecture because you lab her. And if she ask why Chemistry and not Physics, simply tell her that you have chemistry together and Physics can’t explain why you fall for her.

Take her to home for the aged, a park where there are old couple or even to your lolo and lola. Tell her about their love story. Once she’ll get kilig, insert an adlib, tell her “like them, I want to grow old with you.”

Wherever you want to go for that date, go for it. The best place in the world is not the most romantic nor extravagant, but it is beside the person you love. Happy Valentine's Day.

Noon, Ngayon

Good Day!!!