Dear Papa Ken,
Is it hard to answer YES to a question? Please call me Victor. I had a crush on someone, in the same class as mine. Her name is Lou. She is a beautiful girl. Her smile charmed me for a long time. Though she maybe like what they as 'sosyal' but she is actually very approaching and friendly to everyone in our class. I just happen to be around with her because her friends and my friends in class are close. I tried to make her feel about what I think for her yet her respond is mild. One day, Papa Ken, I decided to do what any man can do for the girl of their dreams - to propose to her, to ask her to be my girl friend. I brought chocolates and flowers and set up some of her friends (though some of them, by the looks of their face are reluctant about it). It was a sunny afternoon, in front of some people in our canteen that I proposed to her. "Lou," I started. "Will you be my girl friend?" She smiled for a minute, however, her smile changes to doubts when she cast her stare on me. She answered, "Sorry, Victor. But I think this is not the right time for me to get involved in a relationship." And she just left. Papa Ken, I don't know what to do. Yes, I am sad about what had happened, that she didn't answer YES to my proposal. From that day on, I distanced myself to her. Papa Ken, what is your advice? Will I still pursue her or let it be?
Before I give my advice to you, here is a song from King entitled Maybe
To start with Victor, you're just being impatient. I don't mean to insult you nor anything but you just move with having calculated risk in mind. Are you expecting a girl to say YES right away just because you and her are close enough. Think about it. What if the girl thinks that you are just a friend to her (or a confidant). I maybe wrong but you have just misinterpreted everything.
Now, your question about if you want to pursue her or let her be, I cannot answer it for you. If you pursue her, change your tactics. Remember, ang panliligaw ay parang chess iyan, you make your move with tactics. Think about how the girl of your dreams fall for you. Don't just be close to her for the danger of it is that you might be friend-zone to which any guy would not want it, right? Get to know each other, be close to her but leave some space. On the other hand, if you let her, that's also fine. Try to see if you can live with it.
The best advice that I can give you is don't focus yourself on courtship and of her, because she is not the center of your life. Why not focus on your studies, your relationship to others and your faith? Grow, ika nga. Accept the rejection. I don't also advice you, Victor, to distance yourself to her. She might misinterpret that you are bitter about it and your chances on her will reduce. Rather, let things be normal between the two of you.
Friends, a rejection is inevitable in the game of life. There is no such thing that everyday, the things that we want, we get it right away nor we receive acceptance in a blink of an eye. A rejection doesn't mean that you are not wanted or even, unlove but rather a rejection is just an acceptance in delay, a brother of failure who happens to be a delayed success. The rejection doesn't define you, it is how you accept rejection that defines you. I am Papa Ken, and this is K!Lig-novela @ What's in my notebook.
Good Night!
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